There's real no rhyme or reason to the picture. I just think it's funny.

Anyway, I've moved. My new blog is nomoreexcusesforbeck.blogspot.com.

(As if you needed MORE letters to type in my already-long-ass Blogger address.)

Excusing My Behavior
Well, I think I've been giving myself an out. I'm allowing myself to think "I'm not going to count calories, but I'll just eat a little better." That's not working for me. By not holding myself accountable to...well, myself...I'm allowing bad behavior. Yesterday, I rationalized everything I ate. Here's some insight on my thought patterns:

Breakfast
What I ate: bowl of Peanut Butter Crunch for breakfast.
How I justified it: "This has about as many calories as a bowl of Fiber One or Wheat Chex. And it tastes sooo much better."

Lunch
What I ate: Chef Boyardee Ravioli
How I justified it: "I won't eat very much. Besides, nothing beats the taste of canned ravioli. Mmmm. Canned ravioli."

Dinner
What I ate: pizza and breadsticks
How I justified it: "Man, today sucked. I'm stressed, I have no time to make dinner, and I don't even want what we have available. I'll just have a couple pieces of pizza and a breadstick."

Late-Nite Snack:
What I ate: apples with homemade caramel sauce
How I justified it: "Dude, it's apples. Apples are good for you."

Yyyyeah. I can see how justification only makes my bad decisions worse. Argh.

So today isn't over yet. I just realized I haven't had anything to eat. Bad, bad, BAD! I know. So I'm going to get myself half a half-sandwich - turkey on whole wheat, hold the mayo - and an apple. Yeah. That actually sounds really good. Then I'm going to go grocery shopping and get more fruits and veggies as well as foods that are easy to make. (We've got to factor in convenience since, with the move less than a week away, practically everything is packed away.)

I'm so tired of excusing my bad behavior. It's definitely going to be much better once we get out to Denver, I'm working a regular job, have access to a gym both at work and in our community, and my insanely hectic life is somewhat tamed by a schedule.

Back on the Horse. Again.
Having gone through hell the last nine months, my weight was the first thing to spring back. It absolutely kills me to say this, but I'm back over 200 pounds. 205.6 to be exact.

I'm not sure if anyone even follows this anymore since I've been AWOL since October, but if you do, please don't judge me. Don't tell me what I did wrong and how I quit and blah blah blah. I know what I did wrong. I stopped caring about my weight amidst a non-stop stressful life. There were other things that became much more important to me than watching what I ate. And yes, stress (and money) played a major role in the quality of foods I consumed.

And now I'm rambling.

I'm picking this back up. Am I going to eat perfectly? Never put a simple carb in my body again? Never miss a workout? Can't say that I will. I'm a mom and wife with a full-time job in addition to the other everyday responsibilities. However, I'm going to start making my health a priority again.

If anyone is still out there, I need your support. I don't need to be judged for how I've allowed myself to slip this far, or to be told you don't have faith in my efforts this time around. While I can see the urge to do so (and to a point, the right), that will only discourage me. I can't do discouragement right now.

Ok, wow. This post was way too serious. Time for a joke.

Q. What does Snoop Dogg use to brighten his laundry?

A. Bleeyoch

Thank you. Thank you very much.